I have been gearing up to watch this documentary for a long time! Years even, and I definitely recommend you and your husband sit down and watch it, as well as show it to your kids (there are some curses and breasts in the material they supply for debate so watch it yourself FIRST! and make sure you approve!) I have a very vivid memory of sitting on my boyfriends couch watching a television show, and I was being "rude" and speaking out about the show in a really flippant and annoyed way- I think my exact words were, "all those women are skinny bitches." My boyfriend, reacting actually to his sisters visual discomfort I think, basically told me I was bring rude and to shut up- it was a show she absolutely loved and I'm sure it's very good. What I said was crass and not effective. What I meant was, seriously, why can't women look like real women. Men get to look like real men. Why can't someone who looks like me or your sister be the starring role in a television show. Why don't they exist. Why does everyone's goal on this show right now revolve around romance.
My reaction to this documentary is fairly positive, because it brings up a lot of things I have noticed and had issue with but not been able to express.
My mom says: Be proud of your body! It is the only one you get and it is wonderful!
BUT Media shows: Unless is it too heavy on the bottom, "apple shaped" your butt is too flat, your legs are too chicken-y, your boobs to big (or small or the wrong texture), If your hair is too curly, if your hair is too straight- Heaven forbid you have any kind of flub in the middle. You know what, basically if you aren't thirteen year old carbon copy of the photoshopped version of Meghan Fox HOW DARE YOU SHOW YOUR FACE IN PUBLIC. You should feel ugly.
My mom says: Women are strong. We are often stronger than men in the clutch. We push babies out of our bodies. STRONG.
Media shows: We will cancel those shows portraying strong women after one season because no one likes to see a woman in power unless she is being manipulated and broken down by the men around her. We will make fun of any woman who seeks a position of power- you don't have the right to be seen as a candidate, only as a sex object who is emotionally unstable 'hot or not' and will be constantly judged by *gasp* other women about how your hair looks. You do not have the right to be judged for your opinions only without the filter of your beauty.
Mom and your teachers say: No one asks to be raped. No matter what.
Media shows: Unless you were dressed with a skirt above your knees, then you were asking for it. Or were at a bar. or had any cleavage at all. If you aren't a troll you are asking for it. Even if you are a troll. not only that! If you do file a report (but you should probably just tell your friends then bury it as an unfortunate event) people will always believe you and it will 'go away' by the time the next episode airs. You may have a three episode arc where you deal with these feelings but life moves on really quickly and you'll go back to being your same old self. (This really bothers me because if a boy is bullied or loses a fight in 8th grade it shapes the man he grows up to be, and we are beginning to understand that. But if a girl is molested or raped, impossibly, I feel she is still expected to pop up bright as a daisy in three days like nothing happened. If she seeks help she is teased by peers and ridiculed by eye rolling teachers who want her to "get over it already". I've actually seen this happen, and as a teenager was outraged but silent.
Mom says: You have the right to play sports! Just like the men. Title IX! Go kick ass honey.
Media shows: In teeny tiny shorty shorts that show off your booty, and tight tank tops that show off your tits! You do not have the right to be sweaty and disheveled and completely VICTORIOUS like men do though. because instead of strong, we say you look gross and make fun of you.
Likewise, You can have a high power job! But only if you are pretty. The pretty girls on our shows you would kill to be have confident exteriors but show nail biting insecurities about their intelligence. THis makes them approachable and shows girls that she should never be sure of herself, even if she fits the perfect archetype of "the hottie".
If 'Society' teaches us that men are the smarter, stronger, better sex. If men are smarter, stronger, more emotionally balanced and in general better, shouldn't such a being be perfectly able to raise up successful sons and daughters to add to society? And if being a 'mother' is too tough and intricate for a man, why can a woman do it? A man can negotiate the delicate nuances of a corporate merger, but cannot tell his daughter that he loves her and that she is beautiful without all the makeup- the girls on the TV are not real people, and she should not be having sex at age 13, even if iCarly has a boyfriend. Society says only a man is really qualified to run America, but it is a waste for a man to make sure his family eats healthy, locally sourced ingredients in the dinners he cooks, and finds it wasteful to spend an hour making sure his sons homework is done, teaching him to take pride in cooking or learning how to do laundry? Is it wrong for a man to know how to not shrink your damn sweaters? WHY?
I think being a feminist should not mean you fight for women to replace men in the job market- I think being a feminist is being fair and realizing not every man who is taught he needs to be in a suit , needs to be the breadwinner, needs the corporate job- this does not mean he WANTS to be in a suit, at a desk, driving a truck, working the power lines. Many women who are trapped at home covered in toddler vomit have loftier dreams than working part time at Michaels. They should be able to pursue what they want without being judged as Trolls, Harpies, MILFs. If a woman is the best candidate why not hire a woman over a man. Likewise, if a woman wants to stay home and raise her kids, why is that wrong and looked down on?
Other stuff.
Blather blather. BLah blah. It's not done it's too late to keep spouting sentences with relatively correct punctuation.
One proud accomplishment: I can make an origami bunny.
